Windswept Mind. Windswept India.
About a year ago I journeyed to India. It was the most magically mystical experience of my life. I still catch my breath when I think of the way the Universe manifested to conspire for my highest good.
I’d been working for about a year at a tech company near Silicon Valley. It was the job of my “dreams.” It had ALL of the things my conditioned midwest body and mind attributed to success. Title, power, money, control, and influence. My ego mind believed, “I’ve arrived. I have proved my worth.” Not yet conscious to the fact I was living what I perceived to be my parental dreams - rather than not my own.
When the tides changed and a corporate restructure toppled over my little-big castle built on a foundation of sand, my attitude subsequently shifted. I went from walking on sunshine to plowing through fields of shit on the daily. I was resentful and wore figurative boxing gloves to work every day.
In retrospect, as is usually the case, there was a LOT going on from which to learn. So many lessons. Codependent behaviors I was unaware of, an intense working environment, extreme pressure and demands, plus general disease. I have kindness and compassion for myself now, despite my - at times - unprofessional behavior. Such is life and the adventure of maturing.
When I left that job my intention was to road trip around the Western US. Then my body stepped in to divert the plan. Hours of a body crunching commute put me on the couch for weeks. My mind, body, and soul needed some time to heal. Like life will do, once I surrendered, things started to just flow.
One day I found myself in San Francisco buying a deck of Osho tarot cards. At the time,I had no idea who Osho was. I remember holding the deck in my hands, really looking at them, then putting them down. I left the store and walked blocks away. Then, God whispered loudly in my ears and I turned around to buy them.
That day I began working with the cards, and that night I had a vision of a woman on my couch. The woman turned out to be a mystic I’d been working with who knew Osho and had lived in his Pune Zen Center for years. So I followed the signs and went to the Osho website and began reading about the different meditative therapies offered in Pune. When my soul read about Mystic Rose something clicked. It was on path to fly overseas and participate in the 21 day meditation where for 3 hours a day you laugh, cry, then sit.
It took a few weeks for the information to process through my subtle bodies. Then one night I drew the “Master”, or, Osho card, in my reading. The final piece of the puzzle was in place. I phoned an airline. Wouldn’t you know, the job where so much self misery was manufactured, had traveled me so much that a free flight to India awaited on miles. I held my one-way fare and when I hung up the phone whispered aloud “oh my gosh, I have a flight to India.” Tingles rose through my whole body. That was about 10 days before the mediation started.
Just like that, in spontaneous action, Source speaks through me. I organized all the pieces and parts then made my way to the Southern Hemisphere. To Pune, where Osho’s Zen Center awaited. From there I embarked on the wildest year of my life.
Mystic Rose meditation was the deepest medicine I’ve ever taken. It unzipped me. All of the deep seeded dark and murky self beliefs started springing forward. My mind was in control for a good part of the mediation. I wasn’t yet aware of the distinction between it and my true essence. My heart.
Needless to say I learned to more about myself in my Pune experience than I might’ve in a whole lifetime of work. I am deeply grateful for the people I met along the way who supported me. An Ayurvedic doctor and Osho devotee was my single most saving grace. Growing up in the states I was accustomed to talking about my inner work with therapists, gurus, 12 step sponsors, etc. When his essence arrived I felt supported, seen and heard. I bow to his support and the support of Osho.
Where I once had a “committee” in my head that consisted of ghosts and skeletons in the closet with self beliefs constructed by outdated and conditioned thinking, I now have a mystical set of teachers sitting to guide me. They include Osho, Guru Ram Das, and the Creation. For my new life view, for the blossoming of this mystical rose, I am forever grateful.