I’ve always been a rebel by nature. A rule breaker. Looking for ways and shapes to navigate a new course.
Cuz the one mapped out’s not meant for me.
From the time of my youth to the modern times, my souls been shouting out that I’m a new shape. That’s why the rules don’t work for me. Because I believe each ones meant to be broken.
Outdated opinions of who I am and opinions of archaic “founding fathers” are not my birth right. Fuck that. My birth right is to be me. As wild loud and free as I want to be. And although the masses might still feel safe inside of constructs. I don’t. I’m bigger then that.
My soul is fucking huge.
In my search for freedom and truth, which all lies inside at my core, spiritual principles, masters and teachings have opened my eyes. But all of them ask for a structure , or a pattern to take place. Even my great teacher Osho offers meditative therapies inside his Pune zen center under the construct of “must attend” meditations.
Sorry, not sorry, that doesn’t work for me.
My Kundalini practice which I hold so dear, asks me to find some “grit” in my practice and a daily offering. While true, coming to my alter space every day provides solace and mile markers for me, but the pressure to be and do any one thing on the daily doesn’t work for me.
Permission to be myself in each and every moment does.
That’s why you’ll find me the last to reply to an invite. The first to text on Saturday morning for Saturday afternoon plans. And the one who puts her phone on airplane mode at night.
Cuz my soul just doesn’t fit inside the 3D realms of planning right now.
When I can see it from another side, where service frames the cause, maybe things will be different. But until then, I’ve given myself the freedom to be uniquely me. Weirdly me. Lovely me. Because that’s who my soul chose to be. And I’m the only one around.